You know you’ve been in Denmark too long, when:

- You think its normal to pick up a girl/boy in a pub, walk her/him to her/his bike and ride with her/him back home.

- You go to the supermarket and buy three good beers and 10 not too good ones.

- You honestly believe that the distance between Copenhagen and Aarhus is long.

- The first thing you do on entering a bank/post office/pharmacy etc. is to look for the queue number machine.

- You accept that you will have to queue to take a queue number.

- When a stranger on the street smiles at you, you assume that:

a. he is drunk;
b. he is insane;
c. he is southern european;
d. he is all of the above.

- Can’t remember when to say “please” and “excuse me”.

- You start to believe that if it weren’t for Denmark’s efforts, the world would probably collapse pretty soon.

- You know the meaning of life has something to do with the word “hyggelig”.

- You are very surprised when you receive compliments about ANYTHING – including your appearance/clothing! In fact when you do, you find it suspicious and start thinking they might have ulterior motives.

- You’ve completely forgotten what a “date” is – no one ever comes to pick you up and unexpected gifts are VERY unexpected.

- You don’t think it strange that no one ever comes by to visit without being invited and you never show up at any one’s place unannounced either.

- You wouldn’t dream of coming even 10 minutes early to a party. (Once around the block is always an alternative)

- You find yourself lighting candles when you have guests – even if it is brightly sunny outside and 20 degrees.

- Silence is fun.

- It no longer seems excessive to spend 1500 kr. on alcohol in a single night.

- You know that “religious holiday” means “let’s get pissed”.

- You use “Mmmm” as conversation filler.

- The word “yes” is an intake of breath.

- You have only two facial expressions, smiling or blank.

- You buy your own drink at the bar even when you are with a group of people

- Traditional dinners may not necessarily mean a cooked meal.

- Your wardrobe no longer has suits but blue shirts and mustard colored sports jackets and lots of denim.

- You don’t mind paying the same for a 200-metre bus ride as you do for going 10 kms.

- You know the rules to handball.

- You don’t look twice at businessmen in dark suits wearing white sport socks.

- You find yourself speaking half Swedish with Swedes.

- You find yourself more interested in the alcohol content than the name of the wine.

- It feels natural to wear sport clothes and a backpack everywhere.

- You offer people strange-tasting brown alcoholic liquids with their coffee in the MORNING! (Gammel Dansk!)

Bolas… Estou há demasiado tempo na Dinamarca…